Star Trek: The Next Generation episode “User Interface”

This page of script from an unfilmed episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation recently came to light.  It seems quite prophetic.

March 2021

[V/O PICARD]

Captain’s Log, stardate 53180.08.  The Enterprise is en route to Starbase 47 for repairs.  The crew is looking forward to an extended shore leave.  After our recent adventures, I think we could all use a rest.

WORF

Captain. Incoming message from Starbase 47.

PICARD

A welcome, I hope. On screen, Mr Worf.

ADMIRAL HAGUE

Jean Luc. It’s good to see your face.

PICARD

Admiral Hague. Not bad news, I hope?

ADMIRAL HAGUE

The worst, I’m afraid. The situation at Epsilon Eridani 5 has escalated. I hate to ask, but the Enterprise is the only ship in the sector.  I need you to postpone your shore leave and head there immediately.

PICARD nods seriously

Understood, Admiral.  Enterprise out.

Doctor Crusher, ready the sick bay for patients. Mr La Forge, I need you to coax those warp engines to give me a little more.  Mr Data, lay in a course for Epsilon Eridani 5, maximum warp.

DATA does not respond.

PICARD is annoyed

Mr Data, did you hear me? Lay in a course for—

DATA makes musical beeping noise

PICARD

Lay in a course for—

DATA interrupting

Do you need help? You can say “any gas stations nearby” or “take a selfie”.

PICARD

What? No! Lay in a course for Epsilon Eridani 5. Maximum warp. Make it so!

DATA

“Make it sew”.  This is the definition of sewing: the action or activity of sewing.

PICARD

Something’s wrong.  Commander Data! Run a level one-diagnostic!

DATA

I am doing the best I can, Captain. Did you know today is the anniversary of the birth of the human philosopher Morobuto?  Here, look at this little doodle I drew.

PICARD

Oh, merde.  Mr Worf, deal with Commander Data, will you? I don’t have time for this.

DATA

Language detected: French. Do you wish to engage translation?  “Manqué un quai, aneth avec du goudron de jour commun, tandis que la brebis…”

WORF presses the switch on the back of DATA’s neck, disabling the android

WESLEY CRUSHER moves into the seat as WORF carries DATA away

PICARD

Ah, Mr Crusher.  Welcome back to the bridge. Lay in a course for Epsilon Eridani 5, if you please.

CRUSHER

Aye, Captain. What speed?

PICARD looks thoughtful, turns to RIKER

Number One, what exactly is the situation on Eridani 5?

RIKER

I believe they’re concerned about an imminent takeover of the entire colony by artificial intelligences, Sir.

PICARD relaxes immediately

Ah. Well, I wouldn’t be too worried then. Ahead Warp 2, Mr Crusher. Let’s take the scenic route.  Engage!