For some reason, the Star Trek episode The Devil In The Dark has inspired all sorts of art, despite no Horta character ever appearing in any live-action Trek episode since.  It inspired this as well, to the tune of Dire Straits’ Sultans Of Swing.

May 2023

You got a Devil In The Dark
Eats miners like a shark, it’s showtime
Down on the surface, the Captain says hold everything
The Horta’s not a monster, this is no crime
She’ll feel all right, when McCoy can do his thing.

The man with pointy ears, well he’s not like all of those faces
Beaming in out of the sky to make the walls fall down
Communication put through his paces
Oh, but the minds, they’re meldin’ all round
My mind to your mind
My thoughts to your thoughts
Vulcan bound

So check out Captain Kirk, his all-knowing smirk,
But he’s strictly business, no martian midriffs make libidos sing!
He said the Horta seems quite fond of our Mister Spock
When they mixed their alien minds and did that thing.

And Kirk, he doesn’t mind, says it must have been a sign
You’re getting human, more with every new day!
“I can see no point,” says Spock, “in staying here
Being put down in such a way.”
He’s the Vulcan
He’s the Vulcan of Zing.

And then that ship, she zooms off into the universe
And credits roll just as the theme tune sings
“Live long,” says our boy to himself,
“Ah, but not as long as my homeworld’s kings:
“We are the Vulcans —
“We are the Vulcans of Zing.”