Senator Amanda Vanstone is only one of the disasters launched upon the Australian public by their inability to vote for anyone who isn’t a worthless pillock. The tune to this should be blatantly obvious, but in case you weren’t schooled in the classics, think “yabba-dabba-doo”.

[May 1996]

Vanstone, Mandy Vanstone, she’s a visigoth in comfy shoes.
Vanstone, Mandy Vanstone, never met a friend she could not use.
Let’s cheer when she says she isn’t bright;
That’s one thing she got exactly right;
Vanstone, Mandy Vanstone, she’s an easy woman to confuse.

Vanstone, Mandy Vanstone, great believer in equality:
“Let them sell bananas, it was good enough for folks like me!”
One day, when we’re rid of Howard’s way,
Still we can look back at her and say:
Vanstone, Mandy Vanstone, you’re the model politician —
Devoid of vision —
Until the last degree!