Pauline

Pauline Hanson is one of those legends of evil that future generations will see as too implausible to have ever been real, let alone a real threat, but sadly she is those things in spades.¬† This is to the tune of Dolly Parton’s Jolene.

July 2019

Pauline, Pauline, Pauline, Pauline
With politics you’ve tried to come to grips
Pauline, Pauline, Pauline, Pauline
I’m sure you’d rather just sell fish and chips

In ’96 you set your course,
The Liberal Party’s darkest horse
They were not slow to disendorse – so mean!
Bureaucracy was on your side:
You got in with a big landslide,
And thus began your wildest ride, Pauline.

Your policies were plain and clear:
You hate when darkies get too near —
They’ll fade your curtains, that’s your fear, Pauline.

At first, the sight that made you freeze
Was all those squinty-eyed Chinese,
But now it’s Muslims who displease Pauline.

Pauline, Pauline, Pauline, Pauline
I must admire the way you never stop.
Pauline, Pauline, Pauline, Pauline
But wouldn’t you be happier in a shop?

You wrap yourself up in the flag,
Or sometimes, for an awkward gag,
You’ll wear a burka like it’s drag, Pauline.

Your methods are bizarre and crude,
Yet look how often you’re renewed:
To history’s page you must be glued, Pauline.

Pauline, Pauline, Pauline, Pauline
You’re just another rightwing nutjob hack.
Pauline, Pauline, Pauline, Pauline
We’d much prefer you took your old job back!