This arose from a comment thread on the topic of the bloody postal plebiscite survey. Lines 1 and 7 were provided by Messrs Benno “Below The Line” Rice and Mark “Network Man” Newton, respectively.  The rest is me.

The tune, I hope, is obvious.  If it isn’t, may I present this marvel: the entire song done by “The Surveyard Singers” and edited into a naff lyrics video by me:

September 2017

This is the very model of a postal pseudo-plebiscite,
Indubitably engineered to guarantee we get it right.
Democracy has given us a coalition parliament
And they in turn have given back this pretty little argument.
A vote of individuals could easily have sorted it,
But power-broking puppeteers would never have supported it.
You never knew your friends were bigots? Thanks to this, you now just might.
So grab asbestos knickers and a rainbow flag and join the fight!

Grab asbestos knickers and a rainbow flag and join the fight!
Grab asbestos knickers and a rainbow flag and join the fight!
Grab asbestos knickers and a rainbow flag and join the fight!

It’s very good for riling up progressive passion, chronically
And making us appear to be the bullies, quite ironically
In short, if what they’re looking for is lefty/greenie kryptonite,
This is the very model of a postal pseudo-plebiscite.

In short, if what you’re looking for is lefty/greenie kryptonite,
This is the very model of a postal pseudo-plebiscite.

We know a lot of history, Orlando and the Stonewall Inn.
We hear the ranting radios encouraging a phone call in.
We know that even when it’s won, the bloody fight will never end,
While ever any bigot hides behind the title “Reverend”.
So as our friends are weeping in the dark and chill of 3 a.m.,
Inspired to despair by so-called followers of Bethlehem,
The rest of us who hate to cause a fuss for fear of reprimand:
We’ve had enough of compromise and now is time to take a stand!

We’ve had enough of compromise and now is time to take a stand!
We’ve had enough of compromise and now is time to take a stand!
We’ve had enough of compromise and now is time to take a stand!

Now rainbows are appearing in the shops and sheds and minivans,
As people full of passion for equality are making plans.
And all the “Social Justice” types they ridiculed have learned to fight:
This is the very model of a postal pseudo-plebiscite.

In short, if what the dinosaurs were dreading was a meteorite,
This is the very model of a postal pseudo-plebiscite.