There’s this silly song from a kids’ TV show that my kidlets used to love. The song is The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything.  It seemed obvious, with the present interest in piratical topics, that sooner or later I would find a use for it.  And then I did.

October 2017.

We are the fishermen who don’t annoy the King
We just stay home and read a book
And if you ask us if we annoyed the King
We will tell you: we don’t annoy the King!

Oh, I’ve never burnt a convent
And I’ve never stabbed a Lord Mayor
And I’ve never trapped a kitten
In a bricks-and-mortar wall
And I’ve never poisoned dinner
And I’ve never eaten children
And I’ve never once annoyed a King at all.

Oh I’ve never been untidy
And I’ve never farted loudly
And I’ve never danced lasciviously
At a formal ball
And I’ve never made a fish pun
And I’ve never told a Dad joke
And I’ve never once annoyed a King at all.