Simon and Garfunkel’s The Boxer is another song I’ve wanted to filk for decades, but I never could find the angle. Then I did something that put me into another fellow’s debt, and the angle appeared. See, a bunch of us in the Barony had been attending a demo, and I gave one of our new fencers, Griffin of the Moor, a lift back to his car — and then I drove off with all his stuff by accident! He found a phone, called his phone (which was in the back of my car) and got in touch with me. Got everything back to him, all was well, but he told me he expected some sort of recompense for his trouble. This is that.
August 2026
I am just a fencer though my sword is seldom first
I have studied my Agrippa but I mostly lose to journeymen until I’m pressed
I still won’t rest
For a man wins when he works to win
Or sometimes when he’s blest, hmmm
So I left my seaside residence
On a journey to the south
In the company of comrades
To display our great Society
To all who came, just to see
Seeking out the ones who lingered, in the hopes that two or three
Might become the generation after me
Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie
Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie
Having done my loyal duty I went looking for a lift
And I got an offer
From a grey and bearded Roman who was far too loud
I do declare, with the way the clouds were looming
I was grateful he was there, la la la la la la
[Instrumental break]
Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie
Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie
So he drops me at my crimson cart and whoosh! he’s up and gone
Goin’ home
With my armour and my baggage – is he taunting me?
Haunting me!
Stealing home!
In the clearing stands a fencer
With no money and no goods
And I wonder how to bear it
While this terrible man absconds with all
My riches and my assets – though it’s OK, not for long
‘Cause he came back, and apologised, and even wrote this song, hmmm
Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie
Lie la lie, lie la lie la lie la lie, la la lie la lie
…