Ode To Harvey

The revelations about Harvey Weinstein’s awful behaviour to women over decades of his career just keep coming, and it’s glorious to see women and gay men being believed and predators like him and Spacey and Hoffman and Louis CK finally getting what they deserve.

But one must be charitable. There’s still one thing to thank Harvey for.¬† This is about that. It’s to the tune of Dido’s Thank You.

December 2017.

My jokes are old, you’d wonder why I still drag them out at all
I leave my shirts turned inside out, yeah, my socks scrunched in a ball
And even when I try, be a better man, I almost always fall —
Then the news comes on, and you’ve been so bad, you’ve been so bad…

You did that stuff, got caught, there’s hell to pay, your life goes down the drain.
Your name’s in all the headline news today, your star’s begun to wane,
And when she smiles at me, that familiar sigh, and she tells me I’m OK,
She says beside you, well I’m not so bad, I’m not so bad, so

I want to thank you for making me look so good to my wife
Oh, just compared to you, I’m looking not too bad to my wife

I go to work, I don’t get sued, ’cause I never grope the staff.
I showed my dick to no young girls, so no one had to laugh.
And even if I’m sometimes smug now, it’s not my epitaph,
Because I’m not you… and

I want to thank you for making me look so good to my wife
Oh, just compared to you, I’m looking not too bad to my wife

We want to thank you for making us look so good to our wives
Oh, just compared to you, we’re looking not too bad to our wives…