Oh The Baron!

A true story, of the time a likely lad was taught the error of his ways in the tavern at Festival.

[After Easter, 2003]

A frisky lad he was, and of the ladies very fond,
The short and tall and in-between, the dark, the red, the blonde.
He swore he would bewitch them with his mighty magic wand.
But oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

“Be mindful,” said the Baron, “for there is no other way:
“Go courting with the ladies, but take heed of what they say.
“A ‘yes’ can be a wondrous thing, but ‘nay’ is always ‘nay’,”
Said oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

“I may be young and handsome sir, where you are old and wise,
“But still I have the wit to pierce a lady’s fay disguise!
“A ‘no’ may be upon her lips, a ‘yes’ within her eyes,”
Then oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

And oh the Baron’s hairy, hairy chin, his hairy chin!
And oh the Baron’s mighty smile, his mighty tongue within!
He taught the boy his error, and he taught the boy his sin!
And oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

“I’ll let you speak again, for you deserve a second chance”
But still the lad was resolute, despite a nervous glance:
“A simple word should not obstruct the roadway to romance”
Then oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

And oh the Baron’s hairy, hairy chin, his hairy chin!
And oh the Baron’s mighty smile, his mighty tongue within!
He taught the boy his error, and he taught the boy his sin!
And oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

A third and final time the Baron told the boy the truth,
In due consideration of his ignorance and youth:
“To take what’s not been given is an act I call uncouth.”
Said oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

And here the lad considered, e’er he made his third reply:
“There’s more to love and courtship than the chase, I can’t deny
“But when it’s all considered, ’tis a game and hence a lie…”
Then oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

And oh the Baron’s hairy, hairy chin, his hairy chin!
And oh the Baron’s mighty smile, his mighty tongue within!
He taught the boy his error, and he taught the boy his sin!
And oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!

So off the lad meandered on his worn and weary way
And if any saw his features this is all he had to say:
“I’m having an adjustment to my attitude today…”
And oh the Baron, oh the Baron, oh!